undergraduate psychology student
Hometown: Odenton, Maryland
High School: Arundel High School
I am courageous.
I am a survivor.
I am a victor, not a victim.
My freshman year of high school, I found myself always nervous and struggling with my mood. I would talk to my school counselor who later referred me to see a psychologist. Afterwards, I switched to a therapist who was awesome and I saw her for almost 3 years. I was really struggling with my anxiety and depression. I felt alone and that I couldn’t always share what was going on in my head. My sophomore year of high school, I was diagnosed with three anxiety disorders (obsessive-compulsive disorder, social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder).
My freshman year of high school, I found myself always nervous and struggling with my mood.
It was relieving to know that these conditions could be treated; however, I still felt the stigma of having a mental illness. I sought help from a few doctors, but they made me feel worse and invalidated how I felt. My depression was tricky, and later I found out why. It wasn’t just depression, but Bipolar Disorder, a severe mental illness that involves mania and depression. Mania being an elevated mood state of decreased sleep, abundance of energy, racing thoughts, impulsivity, euphoria or irritability, and possibly psychosis. Depression being emptiness or sadness that lasted weeks accompanied by trouble sleeping, trouble focusing, low appetite and suicidal thoughts.
I found myself on this roller coaster of extreme emotions. I would feel on top of the world, then crash, and feel like life wasn’t worth living. For the most part, I am stable on my medications, but the times that I don’t have my medications is when I relapse. Although, I know many people who support me. I have also experienced people who did not understand and they walked out of my life. I am using this experience as my testimony to help others. Because of my experiences, I have decided to set my career path to be a Clinical Psychologist and help others who are going through what I have been through.